Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Chardonnay and Caramel

Ok. So, I'll admit. I need to post a lot more often. It's just really hard, but tonight I decided to have a few drinks and we all know I am a much better writer when I drink..and I had the homemade caramels for dinner along with some Chardonnay and I have heard that Chardonnay is straight up fucking awesome when paired with caramel, so that is what I had for dinner.  It was pretty fucking good. Probably not healthy, but who am I to judge.......So, chardonnay and caramel is the shit and I will post the caramel recipe tomorrow if I haven't already.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

THE best ever salmon glaze/sauce

So, when we were in Alaska, we went to the Liarsville Salmon Bake in Ketchikan. I have to say that it was probably one of the best meals I have had anywhere, anytime. The salmon, was heaven, since obviously it was local, but the sauce was soooo good. The cook told me the recipe, but by the time I got home I had forgotten it. I searched the web and finally found it.  I'm soooo happy I found it. I will find somewhere on here to post it.....

Hungarian Rice (yes Lisa-Hungarian Rice)

So, today I'm posting an old family rice recipe. My sister in law, Rose, has made this recipe every Christmas for as long as I can remember. It's tasty, it's easy to make and it goes with just about everything. My sister wanted to know WTF Hungarian Rice is, so she's about to find out.  VERY healthy alternative to your box rices.....Screw you rice-a-roni........

You'll find it under "Side Dishes".

Thank you very much.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Fuck Pot Roast

So, it's gotten cold in Ohio and today I decided I'd toss a pot roast into my crock pot. It feels like fall today and pot roast is fall food.  Fittingly enough, my grill ran out of propane yesterday, so I figured this would be a good day to break out the old crock pot.  (Is crock pot one word or two?)

So this morning,  I got the roast defrosted, added my water to the pot and stuck the roast in. I seasoned it with salt and pepper. I chopped some red potatos, onions and carrots and tossed em all in the sonofabitch. I even walked out side and cut some fresh thyme and rosemary and stuck that shit in the pot too.  It cooked  on low heat all day and the house filled up with the smell of homemade pot roast.  Sounds very Martha Stewarty right?

Well, 6 hours later, I opened up the crock pot and it all looked just delicious, but you know what? I don't fucking want pot roast. I don't have the taste for it or the desire for it and I really can't remember why I decided to make it in the first place. The smell is actually making me gag and I decided I ain't eating it. So I poured myself a big ol' bowl of Honeynut Cheerios, made some toast and had a glass of orange juice, and you know what? It was really good. Way better than pot roast.  I'm not sure what my problem is, I just don't feel like eating that shit no matter how tasty it looks.  Have you ever had days like that?  So, I will serve the hubby and kids the pot roast and they better like it.

End of story.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Caramel French Toast

So, I decided I'd try a new french toast recipe. It turned out really good but you gotta eat it quick because once the caramel hardens it's kind of hard to eat.  It's sweet as hell but really good. Give it a try.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Blogging and Drinking

So, I've decided that I blog better and more often when I've been drinking.  Time to stock up on the wine.

Sunday, July 31, 2011

All things lemon

If you ask me which food items I consider to be essential in my kitchen(beside white wine)-- I have quite a list. Fresh lemons are pretty close to the top of that list. Ditto for garlic. Fresh basil. Cracked black pepper. Sea salt, butter and I could go on and on.....So I tried two new recipes tonight that I happened to have pulled from my ass. I used  a lot of lemons in these recipes. Between the food and the fresh squeezed lemonade, I'd guess about a dozen lemons were sacrificed....

Well, it turns out this new recipe was awesome if I don't say so myself.   Everyone took seconds and there were no leftovers. It's also a healthy recipe for those of you that worry about your health.I didn't even put wine into it. So, look for Sue's Lemon Herb Chicken and Zesty Lemon Garlic Pasta Parmesan....Will be posted under main dishes.

Hope you enjoy.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Some kick ass Chicken Pasta Salad

So, I had a leftover roast chicken the other day and even though I throw shit out left and right, I just couldn't bring myself to toss it. So I came up with a new recipe and I have to say it is really tasty. Check it out under "Side Dishes".

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

"Chopped" can just suck it!!!!

I remember when the show "Chopped" first came on the Food Network. I LOVED that damn show. Take a few chefs, throw some ingredients at them and have them make a 3 course meal in a set amount of time. It was a brilliant concept.  Add a few arrogant chefs and a gay, manscaped host with a big head and funny glasses and you've got a hit. I watched it every Tuesday night. My husband even had to sit through Chopped a few times. It was such a fun show. I loved to see what they would come up with and how the judges would just RIP on everything they cooked. They ran through that kitchen like little chickens with their heads cut off and they cooked up a storm.  It was fun. It was exciting.  It was educational!

Today it's just shit. I watch Chopped now and they open the basket of ingredients and I'm like "WHAT THE FUCK?"  What the hell are these ingredients? Are they serious?  "Here you go boys and girls. Open your mystery baskets.  Here are your ingredients...they are: Kippers! Lime Jellow! Camel Liver!   You've got 15 minutes to create an interesting, tasty dish that our celebrity judges will rip apart and vomit back into your lap. Now Go!" 

I can barely watch this show anymore. Who the hell can cook with these ingredients? You've got cooks sweating into all of the food. Cutting themselves. Bleeding on everything. The judges are a bunch of arrogant pricks who frankly need a good ass kicking. And the host? ugh. Don't even get me started. I'd like to see him "chopped" and added to the mystery basket. 

Way to go Food Network for fucking up a perfectly enjoyable show. The ONLY way to make this show enjoyable again would be to add a starving dog to the kitchen and give the judges a bong. Then I might consider watching again.

A kick ass wing sauce recipe

So, I haven't written on my blog in like months. I just haven't had the time. But, today I tried a new recipe for a wing sauce and it was just kick ass. Now, when I make my wings I like to fry the little fuckers first so they get that nice, crispy coating to them....then I toss them in some sauce and finish them on the grill or in the oven, then toss them in some more sauce before I serve them.

I came across this recipe after I googled "Teriyaki wings like BW3". They are NOTHING like the Teriyaki wings there, but apparantly there are asian zingy wings. Sara said it was the "best Asian she's ever had."  Things that make you go hmmmmm.

Anyhow, I will post it for you all to try.  (this is now posted under appetizers)


Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Yo Quero Taco Shit?

So, it's only 8:51 in the morning and I've been doing a lot of thinking. And googling. And writing. Now it's time to blog.  This particular blog is not going to be about MY cooking, thank your lucky stars....it is going to be about Taco Bell and other shit that we eat.  The more I write, the more I'm convinced I should be drinking...because this shit is too disgusting to be real.

No, I have suddenly not become a pompous, food know-it-all and yes, I'll probably wake up tomorrow and forget all about this new crusade of mine, but for the moment..I'm going to rant. And rage.

Currently, there is a class action lawsuit alledging that Taco Bell has less than 35 percent actual meat in it's products. WHAT?

LESS THAN 35 percent meat!! What is in the rest of it then? I don't even want to know. Wait. I do. I watched the Today Show as they did a piece on the topic....Then I googled my fingers to death shortly after to look up everything they talked about. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING TACO BELL? Meatless Tacos? Meatless Burritos? What's next??? No beans????  No cheese??? Where is the BEEF I ask? Where is THE beef?  WHERE is the fucking beef?  Not in Taco Bell meat apparantely......

I find it oddly hilarious that my daughter HATES meat but LOVES Taco Bell....It finally makes sense. Loves Taco Bell...Hates meat...Loves Taco Bell...Hates meat. Now I know why. There's no fucking meat in Taco bell. That's why. Makes perfect sense.

Oh, but there is something called PINK SLIME in Taco Bell meat. I mean, un-meat.  Pink goddamn slime. Google it. Look it up.  Apparantely, our lovely governement has approved this disgusting product, labeled "Pink Slime" by a scientist, to be served to all of us! To be served to our children in their school lunches! PINK SLIME.  Google it. I dare you. Meat byproducts, treated with AMMONIA to kill the E-COLI! YUMM-O.   I bet Rachel Ray can make some 30 minute meals using Pink slime:  "Ladies and gentlemen! Today, I will show you how to make Yummy Pink Slime Sammies, in less than 30 minutes. Oh soooooo delicious. You never know what you'll get in the next bite!" 

Do people really know what they're eating? Do they even want to know?  My readers know how much I love butter and I've explained why. All natural butter. Yum..... I heart butter.....I could bathe in it. But people insist margargine is better for you...oh yeah? Look up the ingredients to margarine. Go ahead, I dare you. Margarine, the great poser.... a butter wanna be.....It's pure fucking poison....How about sugar substitutes? Google Splenda.  Do it....Splenda was a great big goof in the pesticide lab and now they serve it to you to you in a pretty little package.  Have a little rat poison with your coffee sir.

You know, there will never be a cure for cancer. And do you know why? Because of the shit the government is allowing to get into our food and water supply, that's why!! Not to mention the profits that would be lost by the drug companies if a cure were to be found. It's a moneymaker when people are sick, as a friend pointed out to me....  No wonder everyone has cancer and health problems....

And don't even get me started on all of the pharmaceuticals that are shoved down our throats. The commercials are hilarious. They almost give me anal leakage just watching them.... Makes me need a Xanax...STAT!

Have a headache? Take a pill.  Feeling Cranky? Take a pill.  Feeling Bloated? Take a pill. Feeling too skinny? Take a pill.   Feeling too fat? Take a pill.  Cholesterol too high? Take a pill. Cholesterol too low? Take a pill. Low sex drive? Take a pill. High sex drive? Take a pill.  Limp dick? Take a pill..Stiff dick? Take a pill. Want to get pregnant? Take a pill. Want to not be pregnant? Take a pill. High blood pressure? Take a pill. Low blood pressure? Take a pill......Need anything? Just TAKE A FUCKING PILL!!!!!!

They are trying to kill us. That is the deal. So, this is why I will stick with my WINE, my BUTTER, my SUGAR and my WHOLE BEEF TENDERLOINS. At least I know what the hell I'm getting!!!

Rant over.  I will blog about my food again soon.